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July 30, 2007

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I lost my father back in December of 1998. I immediately flew out to Oregon to deal with all of the necessities, legalities, and memorial service, and shipped many of his possessions back to my home in Virginia. Two items of which were his vehicles. A 1984 Nissan pickup, and a 1963 Chevrolet Corvair. 
Being a master mechanic and having amazingly creative skills, he had actually spent many months of hard work restoring the Corvair himself, from the ground up. Fine tuning the engine and giving the car a full makeover, and with a beautiful metallic blue paint job, the vehicle sparkled in the sunlight like a new car right off the show room floor.
So by maintaining his vehicles, I found myself washing and waxing and detailing the Corvair quite often. By covering every inch of the surface of that car, I could almost feel my father's presence and felt comfort in knowing that I was touching that which he touched, and I was feeling a close relationship with him in every wipe across the surface of the vehicle. He sanded and scrubbed and worked and painted that car with his bare hands, and I eventually found my own peace by working so closely with the car.

My Aunt and Uncle here had also worked very hard all around this property in landscaping and planting and developing this place to be such a beautiful environment to visit and enjoy. But in landscaping so extensively, this property definitely requires a great deal of constant time and attention. And after all of our problems this past year the property has been neglected and many of the plants have gotten a little out of control. And just as cars need waxed and polished to maintain a beautiful finish, roses also need trimmed to maintain a continuous display of beauty. My Aunt, Marvis had worked really hard on her roses to maintain them and keep them blooming so beautifully. So over the past few months I have been taking on the task of maintaining the plants on the property, and I have to admit that I do stink at it, and feel that I am failing miserably. After all, they had done quite a job, and the plants do take a lot of time and attention. But again, just like the way I felt with my father's car, I am feeling that with everything I do, I can almost feel her presence in every part of the process. And recently I have been focusing more  attention on the roses and apparently have done something right, because they are all blooming so beautifully, and I suddenly feel so very proud.
Of course the swimming pool is a weird shade of green right now. But that's the next task, and at least for right now, the roses are looking great.

But I have to express to you all, that no matter what the task or endeavor that you end up taking over, whether it be waxing your father's special pride and joy, or trimming your Aunt's beautiful roses, it sure can make a difference inside, and can definitely provide you with the therapy that you really need to feel that person's joys and passions again. And in some way, like me, you might just feel a little closer to them, and almost feel them standing right there beside you, and you might not feel so alone.

Of course in my case, Marvis was right there the whole time, telling me what all I was doing wrong, whereas my father was making excuses why there was so many blemishes in the paint job.

But in whatever you do, I suggest that you do take the time to "trim the roses", and I guarantee it will make you feel better.

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